Here We Go Again
by emilia valentine
Summary: Finn and Rachel are broken up. Can they make it back to each other? With a little help from a certain 70's band, maybe they just might.    Major Finchel, implied Pucktana, Tike, Bartie and Quam. AU after the events of Special Education. Abba content!


**Disclaimer: I own nothing. Glee very sadly isn't mine, and neither are the brilliant song lyrics, all credits go to Ryan Murphy, Lea Michele, Cory Monteith and Abba. **

_I've been cheated by you, since I don't know when._

Rachel Barbra Berry has loved Finn Christopher Hudson for a very, very long time.

She can't quite remember when it started, or even if there was a particular day when he became her number one dream boy. All she knows is that, at least since seventh grade, when she looks at him all she can think about is what it would be like to be his girlfriend. The girlfriend of the most handsome boy in school- and not only the most gorgeous, but one of the kindest guys as well.

He's never slushied her once.

The road to love is a hard one, and it takes a packet of chronic lady, a terrible rendition of 'Sit down your rocking the boat', and a baby-by-his-girlfriend-now-ex-girlfriend-that-wasn't-really-his-baby-after-all to get him to realise that Rachel is the girl for him.

And then, when they finally do get together after Sectionals, it's hardly the fairytale romance she had planned out for them. He's so distance, uninterested almost. When he breaks up with her for Brittana, she gives him a piece of her mind. It's not long till he's chasing after her again.

Then there's a round of love songs, and misunderstandings, and sleepings with cheerleaders, before they finally seem to settle down, together. She can hardly believe it's happening.

But of course, it's far too good to be true. And 'I'll never break up with you' becomes 'I'll do whatever it takes to never have to talk to you again'.

_So I made up my mind, it must come to an end._

He was the one who broke it off. Who ended it. But how could he not?

She cheated on him. Not only did she cheat on him, but she cheated on him with _Puck_.

The guy who used to be his best friend. The guy that got his ex-girlfriend pregnant.

Sure, he may not have been the best of boyfriends. And that he was wrong to have lied about Santana and his fling during the Jesse-St.-Jackass days.

But still…_Puck? Puck?_

It's definitely all her fault. She's wrecked their beautiful relationship single handedly, and he never wants to see her again.

Deep down inside, Finn knows it isn't true.

_Look at me now, will I ever learn? I don't know how, but I suddenly lose control. There's a fire within my soul._

She knows she shouldn't chase him. He said he needed time, space. But Rachel Berry was always terrible at waiting for anything, and Finn isn't about to start being the exception.

So she pesters him. She follows him about, apologising, begging for forgiveness. She knows it's only pushing him away, but somehow, she can't stop.

He's like a drug. His eyes are addictive and if she backs off she gets withdrawal symptoms.

At glee that week, she performs Ke$ha's Your Love Is My Drug. She means ever word she says, but he just looks at her, almost pityingly.

That's when she decides to stop being so damn pathetic.

She's going to be strong, Barbra Streisand strong.

So long, Finchel.

_Just one look and I can here a bell ring. One more look and I forget everything._

He knows he told her to back off, to give him time. At first, she doesn't, and Finn tries desperately to get rid of her.

But when she's gone, giving up finally in the middle of a cold, dark Ohio January, he misses her absurdly. He misses her constantly being there, behind him or beside him, her constant soothing words.

One time, he looks at her in Glee, laughing at something Quinn has said with Mercedes and Tina, and his heart skips a beat or three. She's so beautiful, and she was _his. _But now she's not. He tells himself some more that it was _her _fault, that _she _broke them up.

But truthfully, he can't even tell himself that anymore.

A few days later, he catches site of her in the corridor after lunch, and he almost goes sprinting after his the corridor, wanting simply to hold her hand, or have his arm round her waste or _something!_

But he can't, and that's the end of it.

_Mamma mia, here I go again, my my, how can I resist you? _

They both spend the next week in a state of depression. Rachel because she misses Finn, and seeing him in Glee smiling at Santana and Brittany kills her a little inside. Even emergency Broadway therapy doesn't seem to be working quite the way it used to any more.

Finn because he hates himself for flirting with the two Cheerio's when he knows the only girl he wants is Rachel. Every time he winks at Santana or checks out Brittany in the hallway, he wants to hit himself for being so stupid. But he can't stop now, he's in way too deep. Without realising it, Finn's gone into the deep end.

They both spend the week after that in a state of worse depression than before, because they both know they're still in love with each other and neither of them can do a single stupid thing about it.

_Mamma mia, does it show again, my my, just how much I've missed you?_

When Mr Schue assigns them a duet for regionals, they're both stupidly happy over his decision, though both of them try not to show it.

Rachel puts on her bossy act, convincing herself that she's over him, that everything will be just fine and dandy.

Finn just tries to ignore her as much as possible, singing when she tells him to, trying to express himself through the lyrics. They're singing some old classic by _Abba_, Mamma Mia or something. His mom loves that song. When he tells her they're singing it, she gives a little half smile and wonders how long it will be before her son and that pretty jewish girl realise just how stupid they're being.

_Yes, I've been broken hearted, blue since the day we parted…_

Rachel eventually gives up on the stupid charade of normality she's been putting on and instead works on cultivating a friendship with Quinn. The blond girl, when you get to know her, turns out to be quite nice. Maybe baby-gate has softened her up, Rachel doesn't know. All she cares about is that they both need a bit of TLC right now, and since neither of them is getting it off of anybody else (Puck's b*ggered off back to Santana) they might as well get over the past and help each other a bit. Rachel even baby-sits Beth some Wednesday evenings while Quinn does a yoga class in a bid to regain her figure.

In return, Quinn sits with Rachel while she has the occasional cry about He-With-The-Quiff as they have named him, and comforts her.

After a while, they're closer than sisters.

_Why why, did I ever let you go? _

When he sees her laughing with Sam, or Mike, or Artie, a wave of jealousy courses through him. He knows that nothing could ever happen, of course. Artie's got together with Brittany, Sam's in love with Quinn, and Mike and Tina are all over each other in Glee. But just seeing her smile at another guy makes him miss the times when she smiled at him.

He knows now that he was just as much to blame for the relationship failure as she was. Sure, she may have lit the spark but he kindled the fire, as his mum would put it. He was a crappy boyfriend. He tells him self sternly to block all thoughts of reconciliation, that she still cheated.

But all the same, in bed at night one question runs through his head- why did he ever let her go?

_I've been angry and sad, about things, that you do._

One night at home, when both Hiram and Leroy are fast asleep in their bedroom down the hall but the thundering rain is keeping Rachel wide awake, she thinks about their relationship before the Santana bombshell.

She thinks about all the time he just let her get insulted, about all the times he told her that he thought Santana was 'super hot', about all the times he just left her to fight for herself.

She gets angry then. He blamed it all on her.

She punches the window frame.

_I can't count all the times, that I told you we're through._

.One day, during a rehearsal of their duet for regionals (if they thought that being around each other would be good, they were totally wrong. Instead it makes the missing each other worse.), when they've just finished the fifty billionth run through, Finn sits down to have a drink. Seeing Rachel's green argyle sweater walk away from him towards the drinks dispenser, he has a sudden flashback

"_**I'm not sure I want to go out with you anymore."**_

"_**I didn't know you could make me feel this way."**_

"_**When are you going to realise he isn't in to you like I am."**_

He's been such a jerk to her, every single time they've dated, and yet she keeps coming back.

He's such a douche. Jesse St. Jackass was better for her than him.

_And when you go, when you slam the door, I think you know, that you won't be away too long._

Rachel can't count the number of times she's done one of her infamous storm outs when Finn was her boyfriend.

She was always so demanding of him. So time consuming. No wonder he dumped her.

NO.

She has to stop blaming herself. It wasn't all her, contrary to popular belief.

But she kind of thinks he knows that whenever she walks away from him, she'll come back. She can't not.

She irrevocably loves Finn Hudson, and she can't stop now.

_You know that I'm not that strong._

Finn can't keep this up much longer.

He misses everything about her. Her hair, her delicious brown eyes, her bossiness, the way she used to fit so perfectly in his ape-like arms.

He can't hold out forever. Rachel's like a magnet, and he's a metal filing just waiting to be pulled back to her.

He irrevocably loves Rachel Berry, and he can't stop now.

_Just one look and I can here a bell ring._

Rachel is out on the stage, belting out her solo in Mamma Mia when, for the first time in months, she catches Finn's eye. She falters, her fake stage smile becoming genuine as she catches site of the look he gives her. But then she collects herself, and tells her Finn doesn't love her anymore. It almost ruins her perfect pitch.

_Just one look and I forget everything._

Catching site of her beautiful smile again (the real one, not the fake one she's been doing for the past three months) winds him entirely. He forgets his words, and she gives him a funny look.

Damn her.

_Mamma mia, here I go again, my my, how can I resist you?_

It happens one day after their duet rehearsal. They accidently bump into each other while dancing around the auditorium stage, and she nearly falls- but he catches her in the nick of time. All of a sudden, neither of them can breath, because it's just too perfect, the feeling of their arms round each other again.

Then they're kissing. It's the slowest, sweetest, simplest kiss.

And for a while it makes everything all right.

But when she pulls away, her eyes widen and she runs from the stage.

He can't do this- she's just started to recover, to forget the heartbreak.

But he has, and she did, and they can't go back now.

_Mamma mia, does it show again, my my, just how much I've missed you?_

It's the day of regionals, and they're all in the queue to get on the bus. They both catch site of each other, and turn away, embarrassed.

But right then and there, something snaps in Finn, and he just can't take it any more.

He walks over, and kisses her, square on the lips.

And she kisses him back.

It's like being given all your birthdays and Christmases at once.

_Yes, I been broken hearted, blue since the day we parted…_

They sit and talk all the way to Michigan. They sit at the back, and the rest of the glee clubbers try and ignore the conference that is going on behind them. They spill out everything, how they felt, how they are both, so, so sorry. And for the first time in a while, they feel a little glimmer of happiness again. They decide to be friends.

_Why why, did I ever let you go?_

When they're done talking, they just sit in a kind of comfortable silence, both contemplating what happens next. They know it's impossible to live without each other, but can they make it better?

_Mamma mia, even if I say, bye bye, leave me now or never…_

She kind of knows she'll never leave his side again. But now she's stuck, wondering if now they've sorted out their feelings, they can ever be more than friends.

_Mamma mia, it's a game we play, bye bye, doesn't mean forever…_

They do amazingly at regionals. They blow everyone else out of the water. Mamma Mia goes spectacularly, and the rush he feels being out on that stage, singing with her without all the weirdness is unbeatable. But still, he feels worried. What if he never gets to love her again?

_Mamma mia, here I go again, my my, how can I resist you? Mamma mia, does it show again, my my, just how much I've missed you! Yes, I've been broken hearted, blue since the day we parted, why why, did I ever let you go?_

When they find out they've won, it's the most amazing feeling. In fact, the only feeling that's ever beaten it in her opinion is Finn kissing her the next second. The knowing that she doesn't have to worry any more. Her and Finn are going to be just fine.

_Mamma mia, now I really now, my my, I could never let you go. _

It's three months later, and they've just won nationals. Finn and Rachel stand under the stars at the top of the empire state building in New York and they both feel completely happy, because, they both sing;

"Mamma mia, now I really now, my my, I could never let you go!"


End file.
